I am truly blessed to live my life. I trust in God when I come to a crossroads and it has not failed me yet. I know this has affected my confidence going into this year because of my trust in God. Although, I have always had this anxiety take over me when I begin to start something new in my life. I believe this nervousness is normal but it is hard for me to comprehend because it results in me thinking about doubt. This is a doubt of self and a doubt of my faith in God. I think to myself “What am I doing here?” or “Why am I doing this?” or “I am not good enough for this?”
This ongoing battle is difficult because I feel as if I am one who seems to be (at least on the surface) someone very composed when it comes to things, especially when it comes to faith. My responsibility as a teacher is to be able to express and communicate this with my students.
Even though my goal is to achieve what I have written in my lesson plan, at the end of the day I want my students to know I am a human being. The most effective way I can teach is by being myself.
To be myself is to show what I do right and what I do wrong. The important part about the latter half of that statement is for me to explain my mistakes or the hardships and how I learned from them. This is cura personalis. I care that our students leave with not only an awareness of academics but also to their life and the world around them.
I hope to be a reason this year because these students give me a reason to come back every day at Rockhurst High School.